the eye of the storm

....meet me in the garden

where spirit walks softly....
-drew dellinger
from the poem angels and ancestors

we are in crisis
whether the sun is shining or the rain is falling
the planet
is in drought
the oceans are rising
species are going extinct
at a crazy fast rate
people are kept busy and broke
time and money dictate our lives
we are out of touch with our own quiet voice
that's why we meet in the garden
and sit face to face in a circle
and we listen
on July 22 2009 we sat in HOPE garden and listened
we were the quiet in an ocean of noise
people were in motion
in and out of the circle
i call this our haywire circle
a tablesaw to the west
a tablesaw to the east
fire engines and sirens screaming hell fire a block away
helicopters sending in the distractions
i have been warned about you
dogs yelling
the circle was situated too close to the picnic table
mini burgers and carrot sticks were a hot commodity
Brianna told a story about finding the quiet in the midst of chaos
just as she spoke those words
the sirens were screaming
i started to compare this circle to the last
but this circle spoke of miracles
you and me
a grandmother's dreams about fish
that predict the birth of her grandchildren
miracles
this circle was the reminder that we are the anchor
in this time of fracture
in this time of disconnection
we are the quiet
be the quiet
in the storm that is raging around us
be the peace

arm in arm
shoulder to shoulder
knee to knee
in a circle we find peace
in a circle we find relief
join us in august to celebrate this shape
and celebrate art
and celebrate our stories
and celebrate the drum
quiet in numbers

paradigm shift

this was a moment of alignment
shawn setting audio and mics up at 4 pm
kai'enne and I arrived with food at 4:30pm
circle starts at five pm
i have no idea how many people are coming to the first circle in the garden
12, 15, 18, 20
people begin arriving
norman perrin storyteller extraordinaire arrives first
the sketch crowd shows up like a parade
bikes, dogs, pasta salad, voices, and spirit
we mix and mingle
snack on food
sue cohen and the gardeners from the sketch garden project
honour the circle with their first head of broccoli!
we all ate a piece and shared in the bounty of HOPE community garden
people are still arriving
we begin to form our circle at 5:30
there are about 18 of us filling out the circle
just as we begin to introduce the project and structure of the circle
POR AMOR with their youth from East Scarborough
march across the park towards
coming from the south 14 people strong
beautiful faces lit up with expectations, stories, poems, and fun
they traveled a long ways on the TTC to join the circle
a journey from the east and the north to the south and west
feet, bus, train, bus, feet
and back again.
braved it to the city
we make our circle bigger
30 people strong
spider medicine
microphones
new faces
old faces
we pass the spider stone and we introduce ourselves
we then stand up and play a game of passing a stone and clapping our hands
connecting ourselves and creating the circle
norman then graces us with his magical storytelling talents
he takes us around the world and back again
thailand, africa, canada, armenia, spiral garden, africa, thailand, india, canada
norman charmed us and filled us with the power to tell stories of our own
with his flutes and his spiralling way with words
he let stories tap him on the shoulder and demand that they be told
our circle was a feast
rich like dark chocolate and mountains of gold
but better and more life sustaining
like a heaping bowl of brown rice and steamed greens
kai'enne sang us a song of epic proportions
she tamed us and made wild with her harmonies and poetics
stories came to us from somalia through the centuries
stories about feathers and dreams, yellow birds and dancing lions, gurus and wise children
the drum was introduced
ten djembes from the back of tanika's car
women leading the circle and singing about community love
two gentlemen couldn't wrap their minds around this
their egos fighting the female heartbeat
claiming there was a power struggle in the circle
woman can't teach the drum
you need a drum chief one of them claimed....I'm a drum chief...get yourself a drum chief
the shifting paradigm
welcome to the new world order
Community Love
growing gardens, growing community
nourishing and nurturing
don't get me wrong the circle was supported and strong with quiet male energy
but we did witness full on the anger and fear of the male ego
because he wasn't in the driver's seat
both of these people stumbled upon the circle and joined in and tried to control the flow
but we were there to listen and to share
not to be dictated too or preached too
the paradigm shift is happening in your parks and out your front door
we are sitting in circle and we are linking arms and tales and tails
and we are growing strong through spider medicine
through community love
with food
with stories
with song
with drums
with flutes
with you
with me

a walk in the park with Andrew McMartin from the PINE project

on june 29 eight of us walked in high park
spending time with our beloved
the earth
we braved the thunder and the rain
and we found ourselves in a fragrant green alive sanctuary
we thanked ourselves for taking ourselves from the couch to garden
We made music with Japanese knotweed
wind pipes
we stung ourselves with stinging nettle and cured the sting with burdock
they grow side by side
nature is so smart
sting nettle has a bad rap
it is delicious in omelets...be sure to blanch it before eating
drop the leaves in boiling water to take away the stingers
it makes a great tea
it can sooth your aching arthritis
it can do more
i am still learning
we tasted burdock
too bitter for most
but the baby loved it
she hasn't been spoiled by sugar
we counted ten baby wood ducks
so small and light they could sit on lily pads
a swan wanted bread
a swan on her nest
we hope her eggs are still incubating
we were shown a secret redwood tree growing by the pond
brought here from the west
watch out!
loads of poison ivy in the park
but growing right next door is jewel weed
the antidote
nature is so smart
evolved
before eating anything in the park make sure you can identify the plant in three ways
by the leaves
the shape of the stock
the way the leaves grow out of the stock
the veins in the leaves
the flowers! this can be the best way to identify a plant
be aware many plants have a twin that often aren't edible
there are walks like these happening in the park
take advantage of the fun
and take yourself for a walk
spend time with your beloved
fall in love
you are a genius at falling in love
for more nature love check out
http://www.pineproject.org/
http://www.highpark.org/nature.htm

time space foam

this past weekend was pride in toronto
queer pride
I was at a conference
a man named Brian Swimme was giving a talk
friday night and saturday until 6 pm
I was a little disappointed that I had agreed to go
I was missing out on the beer garden and roller derby halftime show
my girl was wearing short shorts, tall socks and getting sweaty
I was the av girl in a dark auditorium at u of t
but I agreed to go
Ed O'Sullivan thought it was a good idea that I be there
and if Ed or Eimear or Jeannette or Leslie
think it is a good idea
I tend to listen
I have been blessed with mentors
abundant
mentors awakened
and in this dark auditorium in downtown toronto
I was once again in the right spot at the right time
pride
evolution
i was given the language to the knowledge that I already possess in my bones and blood
i have always known the truth
i just didn't know the words in english
i wasn't taught in grade 8 that science is our entry point into the divine
i dropped biology as soon as possible
memory games and facts left me bored and depressed
we really are made of star dust
the hydrogen that was created during the first star that exploded to make our universe is in us
cosmology
we are 15 billion years of knowledge in the making
we are the evolution of a being in process
on monday i woke to the words
"frothing forth" running through my mind
this is a scientific term to describe life becoming in our universe
life is constantly frothing forth
frothing forth frothing forth frothing forth
on tuesday i woke up with clear insight into the depth of this process
in all of our backyards and all of our composts life is frothing forth
in each second life evolves and multiples
my head was filled with the balance of a rainbow burst forth from a garden and the darkness that is our universe....the void...the quiet...the abundant
this is who we are
on wednesday i woke up with the words
"planetize the movement" running through my head
this is a quote from Martin Luther King
brought to me through the poetry of drew dellinger
this morning
July 9th I woke up sobbing
I was weeping for the mass extinction of species
the holocaust
the genocide
20,000 species go extinct each year
this is our doing
humans have become a geological force
this will still be big news in 5 million years
waking up is hard to do
be the change
it won't be easy
you will have to stick to the hard road
but at least if your grand kids asked you what you did
you can say
you ran in the streets and yelled fire
you changed your way of speaking
from resource to relative
from resource to source
from animal to friend to brother to sister
from plant to grandmother
from sun to grandfather
from moon to grandmother
we are all related
give thanks have gratitude
thank yourself
love yourself
have patience

High Park Discovery walk with Andrew McMartin

Next Spoonful Gathering
High Park Discovery Walk
Monday June 29th
6 pm until dark
meet at the High Park Subway Stop
High Park Ave Exit

find out secrets of the park
natural dyes
edibles
medicines
tools
animal tracks
life in the city

there is a lot more to the story

stories and art
reconnecting with land and each other
this is how we will find our way through the pain
stories and art saved my life
stories and art taught me how to be
stories and art changed me
this is what the fourteenth circle was all about
we also touched on death, being indigenous, ancestors, connection to place,
memory, the guilt that we carry through our ancestors, the longing for connection to land,
patterns in history and cultures.....you will find the truth in the patterns.
patterns don't lie
it is wonderful to sit in circle and have the space to discuss these kinds of things.
it is inspiring and invigorating to make a film with people
this is what I love....collaboration, teamwork, and brainstorming
fitting our stories together
finding the thread that weaves our stories side by side
this is how we are going to make it through the next few years
through the awakening
through the crisis

together

with compassion in one hand and insight into our radical interdependence with all phenomena in the other hand
these are our tools
I would also like laughter, creativity, innovation, and courage in my toolbox
we are in training
body mind and spirit
hear the call
begin to exit and open your eyes
join the movement for life
for change
for love
for light
you are powerful
you are divine
hear the call
answer the call

finding the threads

we are hanging by a frail thread
all life is threatened
we are here in the future
where we drink water full of pesticides, pharmaceuticals, and jet fuel
our food is engineered and we are distracted to the point of exhaustion
we have created hell on earth.
it is our creation
and we can unmake it.
this is good news
the other good news is that we are here together
with each circle that we hold I become aware of the importance of sharing our stories
sharing our dreams
facing our pain together
creating art and beauty together
speaking from our hearts
loving ourselves
finding joy and success in the simplest actions
taking action
it is time to share our dreams and sounds
we are in the beginning
and in the beginning there was darkness
the first creation was sound
make some noise
and listen
this is scary for me
my voice is scary to me
will it crack, will it go off key, will they laugh at my tone and tonelessness?
i know that I will feel stronger if I start to use my voice
this comes at the same time that I am learning to be a more attentive listener
funny how that happens
two sides of the same coin
listening and sounding
both are hard and both are calling
a spoonful of honey grows with each week.
the film and installation are finding their shape
we are finding the thread that weaves through all our stories
we share
we will begin in darkness and end in darkness
the power of art to make change and give voice to the people
is empowering and exciting
join the circle
listen to your elders
listen to yourself